Friday, July 21, 2006

One More PMS Joke, And…

Just yesterday I got a panicked call from one my guy friends over incessant fights he’s been having with his girlfriend lately. He was at his wits’ end and could not comprehend for the life of him what sets her off these days! And then he goes on to say, “You think it is just a major case of PMS?” Yeah genius, that’s what it is, PMS, coz’ the other three million possible reasons were just put to rest with THAT irrefutable logic. And I would have even let it pass had he not gone on to crack a particular joke!

What’s the difference between a woman having her period and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with a terrorist.

So, who comes up with these jokes? (Another quip about getting a sense of humor before anything else and I will..) Is it a bunch of beer gulping, testosterone heavy, pot-bellied, ill-groomed men (ok, I know you get the point) sitting around in a room, lets say isolated from, the whole world maybe, who come up with such lame wisecracks?

Yes, I am mad. Very.

What is it with men who write off our every slight deviation into the road not taken that gets them to immediately wear that puzzled expression, gradually followed by, “Oh, is it that time of the month again?”

Come on, can’t we get a little aggressive now and then? (Imagine walking around in stilettos all day, hell, we deserve a punching bag at our disposal!) So what if we take off on a rabid rant, we can be opinionated too! Ok, so we get crabby, irritable, and homicidal with mood swings from earth to moon, but hey I am still allowed to take a stand, aren’t I? Men with their “Oh, thaaat explains it” attitude are just so infuriating.

But in all fairness, I have known many women who continue to take advantage of the situation. For starters, it is a great alternative to “Honey, I have a headache tonight!” Plus, it gives us a great “out” for any unwarranted/undesired situation. Don’t feel like going someplace or doing something, you lean on the magic days. Feeling rather bitchy and just dying to get it out? Have a confrontation and then apologetically blame “those” days. You get to make your point and still get to look victimized and sheepish.

And before the men of the world unite and in chorus go, “I just knew it”, wait a minute, wait a minute. Here’s the number one rule that men need to get ingrained in their genetic code, no matter what happens and what she does, a man is not allowed to comment on the PMS issue. Not ever. We however can take off on any tangent, that’s our prerogative. And a well-deserved one damn it.

And, once again, hold back those, come on woman, ease up, get a sense of humor! Coz’ I won’t. Humph!

If I hear one more PMS joke, I will personally hunt you down and…

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